“The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice; he who fathers a wise son will be glad in him.” – Proverbs 23:24
I have a 3-year-old and he has a stubborn streak. Several times during the average day I will ask him to do something or not do something and he will refuse. Sometimes this comes with throwing a fit and it almost always ends with him sitting in time-out.
While sitting in time-out, he will scream and yell about how he doesn’t want to be in time-out. Eventually, he calms down, we talk, he apologizes, I forgive him, we pray, I assure him I still love him and he ends doing what I asked before the fits and time-out.
I have tried to explain to him dozens of times that when I tell him to do something or not do something it’s for his good. If he would just obey me in the first place, he wouldn’t have to go to time-out. He would be happier. I would be happier. Everything would be better. Of course, that message hasn’t gotten through.
Why Do I Do This? Why do I go through the hassle of disciplining my child? Why do I tell him to do this and not do that? I’m trying to raise him to be wise, wise in the Lord and wise to live a good life. It would give me great joy to see both my kids grow up to love Jesus, be kind to others, and be wise in how they live their lives.
Often, when we talk about honoring our parents, we talk about obedience. There is a greater way we honor them, though. Obedience is great for a moment, but there is something that lasts longer. We can honor (or dishonor) our parents by how we live our lives.
So, this Father’s Day. Tell your dad you love him. Listen and obey. But also, let us honor our fathers not only in obedience, but in how we live.
Heavenly Father,
You have given us parents for our own good, that we may be well cared for and trained up in all wisdom. Help me to live in such as way to to bring honor to my parents. Help me also to honor You, my heavenly Father.
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” – Ephesians 6:4
What are the most important things parents can do to raise their kids in the faith?
I suppose we, first, have to simply acknowledge that it is the parents’ responsibility to raise their children in the faith.
There’s been a movement in our society to let kids figure God out on their own (or decide there is no God). Recently, I’ve been seeing 50+ messages a day on TV instructing my kids on how to wash their hands. Yet, I’m not supposed to instruct them about God? Nonsense.
Ephesians 6 gives both a positive and negative spin on it. Father’s don’t provoke your children to anger (negative). Do bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (positive). This is also echoed in Colossians 3,
“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” – Colossians 3:21
The Negative How we treat our kids affects them (surprise). If we constantly put them down, nag them, or are overly harsh in our discipline, we can provoke them to anger and cause them to be discouraged. Yes, all kids will get angry at their parents at times, but by showing them compassion (and with them maturing some), they will move past that and see the wisdom and love in what was done. When we mistreat them, they just become perpetually angry and discouraged.
The Positive God’s way is different. Like He does for us, God wants us to lift up and encourage our children. We are to teach them about the Lord and encourage them in the faith. Notice, this still includes discipline, but it’s loving discipline intended to teach and strengthen.
When we do this, our children can grow up to know and love the Lord. They can grow up to be wise and love their parents.
Dads, You Count…A Lot Sitcoms, for a long time, disparaged fathers. They were shown to be idiots and unable to raise their kids. Thankfully, I’ve seen this trend starting to change. The truth is fathers are extremely important (and capable) in the raising of their kids, especially when it comes to teaching them about Jesus.
In fact, a European study, “The Demographic Characteristics of the Linguist and Religious Groups in Switzerland” found,
“The religious practices of the father . . . above all, determines the future attendance or absence from church of the children.”
So, what is the most influential way we raise our kids in the faith?
We live our lives of faith in front of them. We don’t just talk. We do. We regularly participate in the church. We read the Bible. We pray. We care for others. We forgive. When we sin (and we will), we confess and ask for forgiveness. We do all of this with and in front of our kids.
Children tend to emulate their parents, especially when they aren’t provoked, but are loved and cared for. So, let’s give them something to emulate.
Dear Jesus,
You have not only loved us with words, but with actions. Help us to love our children with both words and actions. Forgive us when we do wrong. Keep our children and ourselves firmly in the faith.
“Sing to God, sing praises to his name; lift up a song to him who rides through the deserts; his name is the Lord; exult before him! Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation.” – Psalm 68:4-5
How do you like to praise God?
Some of us have had great earthly dads who love us and cared for us and some of us had dads who were hurtful or absent. However, all of us have a Father who loves us greatly.
He is the father to the fatherless, protector of widows, savior of sinners, and King of kings. He provides for us, cares for us, comforts us, and strengthens us.
He makes the sun to shine and the rain to water the fields. He gives order to chaos and peace in the storm. He is the strength of the weak and the humbler of the strong. He is wisdom. He is love. He is peace.
This is your Father is heaven and so much more.
There are many ways to praise God…
You can sing songs of praise
You can pray
You can read Bible passages that praise Him
You can write a poem
etc.
Take a few minutes to praise God. Do it however you like to praise.
“Whoever fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for their children it will be a refuge.” – Proverbs 14:27
Fatherhood can be joyous and challenging. There are times when you get to feel like the hero and there are times when it seems you can do nothing right in the eyes of your children.
Fathers are wonderful gifts. At times our society has diminished the roles of fathers, yet recent studies have shown that having a father active in their child’s life makes a big difference in a child’s life.
“Research from the University of Pennsylvania which indicates that children who feel a closeness and warmth with their father are twice as likely to enter college, 75 percent less likely to have a child in their teen years, 80 percent less likely to be incarcerated and half as likely to show various signs of depression.” (1)
Fatherhood carries many challenges and fathers can find themselves struggling to juggle their various responsibilities, such as providing for the family, being there for their children, etc. Proverbs and other places in the Bible, however, tell us the most important role of a father, to fear and love the Lord and pass the faith on to their children.
Dads, teaching your children about God and how to live a life of faith will help to raise them to be adults who love the Lord. Even more, though, when you love God and show that love in the way you live, your children will see that and will learn that what you are teaching them isn’t just words, but something that is involved in every aspect of their lives.
Thank you, Dads. Thank you for teaching us. Thank you for loving us. Thank you for pushing us. Thank you for playing with us. Thank you for loving God and showing us what a life of faith looks like.
To my Dad…Thank you for being there for me, teaching me, loving me, and sharing the love of Jesus with me. I love you.
Heavenly Father,
Thank you for fathers. Please bless our fathers. Help our culture to see the value of fathers in our lives.